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November 4, 2006
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i will meet you
at Lehr's Motel
under the motel sign,
"hot water
cold running
air conditioned tv."
we will dress as ravens wings,
stand fiingertip to fingertip,
and blow away,
words floating off a page,
our feet dangling in sky.

i will meet you
after we have  drifted
like two dandilions lifted
among Ten thousand more bronze seeds
dry twisting in a breeze,
each scrambling for sweet earth
each holding dreamlessness.

     They blossom into boredom
     to sip the last drops of rain.
     hacking up green plegm
     biting their leaves,
     and blaming aphids.
     cracking their stems,
     into withered spines.
     no honey bee makes love to them.
     They suffocate for sunshine.

          "dress in the dollar bill
          curl up with the dollar bill
          roll up the dollar bill
          choke on the dollar bill."

i will meet you
in the cornfield,
over Verizon's billboard
"cheap high
speed connection."
We will shatter there.
To break the bars of geometry
of biology
of cosmology
of sunrise.

under bitter sky
among ten thousand hungry ears,
dew-filled and curled like
twisted tawny tounges.

We're wasted seeds
dropping like bombs black as ravens wings.
:iconkhrishna:
i havnt yet submitted an untitled poem here.
but everything i tried seemed to make less and less sense than the last.
then i realized that those were probably the closest words to a "description"
that i could have written for this piece and so i let the untitling stand.
good lines or bad lines i'm tired of fooling with them for now.=) enjoy.
Add a Comment:
 
:iconforgivingmaiden:
perhaps you
are the Criminal with Such Grace
Reply
:iconangie1969:
~angie1969 Apr 27, 2007  Hobbyist General Artist
:heart: it... i just saw it... i'm blind when i'm awake :D
Reply
:icongoofyromantic:
Has anyone ever told you that you're whiskeys best friend?

This is a night so beautiful that I think Bacchus gave it to me. Irish whiskey, brilliant amateur poetry...now it's time to enjoy the world around me with an unfiltered Pall Mall
Reply
:iconkhrishna:
i may be good for wiskey but it's not good for me.
he and i have that sort of relationship.
the kind where i find myself waking up on the kitchen floor
and not knowing how i got there. =)

bacchus must indeed be proud.
Reply
:icongirldisrupted:
ok.. first the little nitpicks.
in the first and last stanza ravens should be raven's
and you've got a typo in the first 'fingertip'
in the second stanza
dandilions should be dandelions
in the third stanza
plegm should be phlegm

now that that's out of the way..
there's something about those references to motel signs and billboards.. i can't exactly put my finger on it.. i think it's the combination of what seems like this tragic romance and these symbols of modern life.. it creates such a vivid atmosphere.

it's been said but its worth repeating... it's good reading you again.
Reply
:iconkhrishna:
i thought that with so much metaphor
and juxtaposition in the poem that they might
give it a little solid ground to stand on. i'm glad they did their job. =)
thank you.

ah, and thank you for pointing out those errors too.

"plegm" ...:ohmygod: that's what i get for not running spell check.
thanks again though. :flowerpot:
Reply
:icondeemer:
I loved this. Good to read something from you again, and it's definatly an impressive piece of poetry.

STOP INSPIRING ME DAMMIT.

(great job, seriously. Now come to belgium.)
Reply
:iconkhrishna:
i'm glad you enjoyed it yes yes yes.

i hear and obey, master. :ninja: <<genie

thank you!:anger:
Reply
:iconinnocence-maintained:
I totally enjoyed this, the way its choppy and moves about the page. I love the randomness. i love it all, the wording, phrases...everything
Reply
:iconkhrishna:
thank you for the comment
and the fave.
i think it
s
by far as
nice as you say but
i never dispute such
graciousness and i'm happy
you enjoyed it. =) thanks again.
Reply
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